We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America. The preamble to the constitution...the document that we as a nation should hold dear.
A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed. This the 2nd amendment which protects the constitution and keeps its citizens safe, or so it should.
The hotly debated issue with the ownership and allowance of guns in america has confused and occluded these words. i am of course pro 2A. Why you may ask, well simply put i am a gun owner. Not only that, I am a black gun owner,which in todays mainstream is not a good thing. Here I am going to explain why I am a gun owner why most people should have a gun and why there is such an issue with gun control.
First off I own a gun for protection, of myself and of my family. Now before you say but that is why there are police, think about how often you have wished for the presence of an officer in a non-critical situation. Now i recently had a time where i had to call the police...their response time....45 minutes. Let me repeat that 45 min in a major metropolitan area. In a situation that had the very big potential of escalatining into violent situation the police response time was 45 min. Police are a reactionary force not preventative. They cannot be called and rush to your defense and save you in the nick of time. This isnt a movie, this is real life, so reaction time is critical. No i wasnt carrying at the time, but had i been things would have probably started and ended differently. No I am not saying viloence would have ensued in fact i am sure that things would have not escalated to having the police show up. But again they showed up 45 min later. So carrrying for protection....yes I am happy to.
Next any able bodied, adult person in america should own a gun. What do I mean by able bodied? Well if you can operate any type of household appliance with out diffculty, I think you should be able to own a gun. No i am not inculding convicted felons, or people that have major pyschiatric issues or are on meds for such an issue. I am not saying iof you are against violence or things that have to do with violence, please dont own one. If you are afraid of guns, get educated on them. Dont just go with the flow and say guns kill people, because yes they are the tool but people have to use the tool for it to do what it is intended to do.
Monday, March 27, 2017
Wednesday, January 20, 2016
Relationship Goals
So a younger friend of mine has returned from a long sojurn to a nice tropical island far far away. I recently found out that he ended things with this gf of 3.5 years. This is sad, the thing that got me was how he was explaing how things were going and what lead up to the break up. My signifigant other and I then related to him some relationship goals. Things that every person should be working towards. Things that so many relationships dont even come close to having these days.
In doing that, it made me look at all the examples of great long lasting relatuionships that i have had the joy to experience. If i knew then what I know now.....how my relatiuonships would have been so different. Not that i am an expert in any way but i can see where we have gone so far healthy happy relationships to these sick twisted farces we call relationships.
One day i may write on thse things but rest assured I have found the map to a sucessful and very fulling relationship. Its not all the answers but it is the baisis for all the answers.
In doing that, it made me look at all the examples of great long lasting relatuionships that i have had the joy to experience. If i knew then what I know now.....how my relatiuonships would have been so different. Not that i am an expert in any way but i can see where we have gone so far healthy happy relationships to these sick twisted farces we call relationships.
One day i may write on thse things but rest assured I have found the map to a sucessful and very fulling relationship. Its not all the answers but it is the baisis for all the answers.
Saturday, December 5, 2015
Merry Christians
As Christmas approaches I am hearing more and more about how Christianity is coming under attack. And i couldn't agree more, Christmas is coming under attack. But it is not coming from where every one thinks it is. The attack us cumming from the inside. That's right it is Christians attacking the sanctity of Christmas. One Pastor is calling for a boycott of Starbucks because they decided to take Christmas ornamentation off of their cups. Cups that they sell for profit without a care in the world about christian sensibilities.
What does Christmas really mean? What does it mean to be christian during this time of year? Why is it so important for Christians to know how Christmas came about? I will answer these questions and challenge Christians to actually do what they claim; uphold their Christianity.
So lets look at what Christmas really is. Christmas is historically a holiday celebrated by Germanic tribes normally held at the winter solstice. The holiday was actually a week long celebration culminating on the day of the solstice. Trees were decorated with candles and such. Hence the song oh tanenbaum....yeah that Christmas song sung best by Nat King Cole. Yeah it is a barbarian holiday. How did it become a "christian holiday"? Well the Roman catholic church some time in the middle ages decided that once these tribes had been conquered. they could keep their traditions as long as they converted to Christianity.
The importance of this is that Christmas.....is not a christian holiday. The imagery has its roots in paganism. The total idea has its roots in paganism. Not to say it cant be a good holiday to celebrate the Lord our God but understand this Christmas hoopla is not celebrating Christ's birthday. Sorry guys Jesus was not born on December 25th. But that is for another blog. So now we know why and how Christmas came about. Now lets examine what it means to be christian during this time of year.
See in the Bible it says it is better to give than receive. No that doesn't mean giving gifts to your kids or family, though that is nice that is not what it means. Now since Christmas is a time that we should be giving of ourselves and of the blessings that we have been given. See as Christians we are called to be Christ like. Meaning, that this time more than ever we as Christians should be giving our time to the needy. the sick, the shut in, those less fortunate than us.
Christianity has become a catch phrase a trend for those who think that being "good" is going to get them to heaven. However there is no faith without works. Meaning that you cant work your way into heaven but you have true faith without showing it.
So how does this all mean that Christians are attacking our own beliefs? Because you can see it in the sermons preached, the way those in church act toward those less fortunate than themselves. We see it in what Christians stand for. How hard they try to thump the bible at some one to get them to change. Christmas for Christians should be about being a servant of Christ. Being a servant to to people of all creeds and colors and beliefs.
What does Christmas really mean? What does it mean to be christian during this time of year? Why is it so important for Christians to know how Christmas came about? I will answer these questions and challenge Christians to actually do what they claim; uphold their Christianity.
So lets look at what Christmas really is. Christmas is historically a holiday celebrated by Germanic tribes normally held at the winter solstice. The holiday was actually a week long celebration culminating on the day of the solstice. Trees were decorated with candles and such. Hence the song oh tanenbaum....yeah that Christmas song sung best by Nat King Cole. Yeah it is a barbarian holiday. How did it become a "christian holiday"? Well the Roman catholic church some time in the middle ages decided that once these tribes had been conquered. they could keep their traditions as long as they converted to Christianity.
The importance of this is that Christmas.....is not a christian holiday. The imagery has its roots in paganism. The total idea has its roots in paganism. Not to say it cant be a good holiday to celebrate the Lord our God but understand this Christmas hoopla is not celebrating Christ's birthday. Sorry guys Jesus was not born on December 25th. But that is for another blog. So now we know why and how Christmas came about. Now lets examine what it means to be christian during this time of year.
See in the Bible it says it is better to give than receive. No that doesn't mean giving gifts to your kids or family, though that is nice that is not what it means. Now since Christmas is a time that we should be giving of ourselves and of the blessings that we have been given. See as Christians we are called to be Christ like. Meaning, that this time more than ever we as Christians should be giving our time to the needy. the sick, the shut in, those less fortunate than us.
Christianity has become a catch phrase a trend for those who think that being "good" is going to get them to heaven. However there is no faith without works. Meaning that you cant work your way into heaven but you have true faith without showing it.
So how does this all mean that Christians are attacking our own beliefs? Because you can see it in the sermons preached, the way those in church act toward those less fortunate than themselves. We see it in what Christians stand for. How hard they try to thump the bible at some one to get them to change. Christmas for Christians should be about being a servant of Christ. Being a servant to to people of all creeds and colors and beliefs.
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Gun Ownership
So still in the news is the issue of guns. Should we have them? If we have them what calibers should we allow? After that comes style and mag size and a whole host of other things that really don't have to do with how effective a gun is. So this is my take on the debate and what we should do about the gun control problem.
First off, we need to stop demonizing guns. They have no personalities; they are not evil or good. They are tools. To say guns are evil is to say a hammer is evil. It really makes no sense. Guns are inanimate objects with no will of their own. A hunk of metal and plastics put together to form a tool like any other. This is a gun., While I have heard of misfires and run aways and several other things a gun can do when mis handled, I have never heard of a gun growing legs and a brian and a grudge and actively seeking out some one to harm.
Secondly we dont need gun control, we need people control. Since this country was founded the people, that is the immigrants from europe have had guns. So why after 250 years do we suddenly need to regulate weapons. Why in the past 4 decades have guns become such a problem? Are guns getting ready to stage a take over of the Western Hemisphere? Or is under the guise of becoming more civilized we have given into our fears? The founding fathers had a premionition of the powers that could be abused by a goverment. Goverment doesnt repsect an unarmed populace but they also made sure the poulace could not terroize thre goverment. Our 2nd ammendment rights are framed in the context of a militia not an individual buit it is the individual that must carry they gun and form a militia. So our founding fathers had an idea of what kind of people control was needed.
Now i am all for the individual owing, training and maintaing their own weapons. In my houshold I hope to train everyone on the use of hand guns, shotguns, and rifles. I dont expect everyone to be a trined marksman, but i do want everyone to be able to recognize and use a gun. Not because I am violent; but because in todays world to many are victims of violence. Criminlas when met with some one compentent in the use of a gun do tend to run instead of stand their ground. Those that do tend to end up injured or dead.
Hisotrically every time a leader has disarmed the people atrocites perpetuated by the goverment have happened. Lets look to WWII germany, look to china, russia, and now the middle east. Lets not close our eyes to what is happening eventhough the news shows us this is what happens with gun ownership. No thats not what happens when responsible people have guns. Sure there are times when a gun is not needed, but in light of recent events; a shooting at a church terroist threats against specific cities, home invasions. The list is long and plentiful and so many would argue against having a gun, but why?
A parting question just to think about something for a time. Why are we so against guns, when knives, bows and arrows, spear guns, spears, machetes, and various other weapons are available and just as deadly. So what is it that we have against guns?
First off, we need to stop demonizing guns. They have no personalities; they are not evil or good. They are tools. To say guns are evil is to say a hammer is evil. It really makes no sense. Guns are inanimate objects with no will of their own. A hunk of metal and plastics put together to form a tool like any other. This is a gun., While I have heard of misfires and run aways and several other things a gun can do when mis handled, I have never heard of a gun growing legs and a brian and a grudge and actively seeking out some one to harm.
Secondly we dont need gun control, we need people control. Since this country was founded the people, that is the immigrants from europe have had guns. So why after 250 years do we suddenly need to regulate weapons. Why in the past 4 decades have guns become such a problem? Are guns getting ready to stage a take over of the Western Hemisphere? Or is under the guise of becoming more civilized we have given into our fears? The founding fathers had a premionition of the powers that could be abused by a goverment. Goverment doesnt repsect an unarmed populace but they also made sure the poulace could not terroize thre goverment. Our 2nd ammendment rights are framed in the context of a militia not an individual buit it is the individual that must carry they gun and form a militia. So our founding fathers had an idea of what kind of people control was needed.
Now i am all for the individual owing, training and maintaing their own weapons. In my houshold I hope to train everyone on the use of hand guns, shotguns, and rifles. I dont expect everyone to be a trined marksman, but i do want everyone to be able to recognize and use a gun. Not because I am violent; but because in todays world to many are victims of violence. Criminlas when met with some one compentent in the use of a gun do tend to run instead of stand their ground. Those that do tend to end up injured or dead.
Hisotrically every time a leader has disarmed the people atrocites perpetuated by the goverment have happened. Lets look to WWII germany, look to china, russia, and now the middle east. Lets not close our eyes to what is happening eventhough the news shows us this is what happens with gun ownership. No thats not what happens when responsible people have guns. Sure there are times when a gun is not needed, but in light of recent events; a shooting at a church terroist threats against specific cities, home invasions. The list is long and plentiful and so many would argue against having a gun, but why?
A parting question just to think about something for a time. Why are we so against guns, when knives, bows and arrows, spear guns, spears, machetes, and various other weapons are available and just as deadly. So what is it that we have against guns?
Sunday, November 15, 2015
Why I Work
So I don't write often simply because i occupy so much of my time looking for sleep. This summer i realized something about myself that i hope to change somewhat. I work when i am bored. Now for some people they would say that is a good thing , but the fact is...I over work out of boredom. It takes a lot to keep my mind occupied and most of the time i find that immersing myself in work is one of the ways I do that. Now this is good for the pay check to be sure. Over the summer i was loving those nice sized checks.
The downside is all that work affected my health. Yes most people look at me and say something like but you are so big and healthy looking and so on and so forth. But really as a diabetic I am killing myself out of boredom. I ingest way to many energy drinks to stay awake and lucid. I was eating terribly for a time(that has changed now) and sleep... there were to many days where i ran off of 5 hours sleep...max.
So boredom equals a slow death for me while appearing to be hale and whole. So then I would think that i should find something to occupy time so i don't get bored. Problem is I find my self grasping concepts and ideals much quicker that i used to. Should i then work on meditation and relaxation or should i continually move forward?
And as i type this you can probably guess where i am. I cant tell my boss no....well not often. Even with major back pain, limping because the muscles are tightened so badly I still accepted a shift sitting out in the cold. Yes bills have to be paid, but i seem to be driven...or it may be that i drive myself mercilessly to attain.....something. Just rambling thoughts running through my head as I sit work trying not to turn into a toffeeciclce becausr the desert in the winter is COLD.
The downside is all that work affected my health. Yes most people look at me and say something like but you are so big and healthy looking and so on and so forth. But really as a diabetic I am killing myself out of boredom. I ingest way to many energy drinks to stay awake and lucid. I was eating terribly for a time(that has changed now) and sleep... there were to many days where i ran off of 5 hours sleep...max.
So boredom equals a slow death for me while appearing to be hale and whole. So then I would think that i should find something to occupy time so i don't get bored. Problem is I find my self grasping concepts and ideals much quicker that i used to. Should i then work on meditation and relaxation or should i continually move forward?
And as i type this you can probably guess where i am. I cant tell my boss no....well not often. Even with major back pain, limping because the muscles are tightened so badly I still accepted a shift sitting out in the cold. Yes bills have to be paid, but i seem to be driven...or it may be that i drive myself mercilessly to attain.....something. Just rambling thoughts running through my head as I sit work trying not to turn into a toffeeciclce becausr the desert in the winter is COLD.
Saturday, October 10, 2015
Women today
So...... work. I work at a night club and I am astounded by the sheer vapidity that I run into on a nightly baisis. I makes me wonder how do these people make it through their day to day. They say ignorance is bliss, obviously these people have taken it to heart. But today I want to focus on the female. Whilst done up beautifully made attractive in form and dress these subjects seemingly lack one very important factor.
I am not trying to be mean, but in hearing the conversations of these women I wonder if these conversations are normal. Lacking in content that might provoke a thought, the conversation seems more in line with something found on the show the jersey Shore than in real life. While these women are very nice to look at that's about it. Now I should point out that yes after years of growing up and learning a few small things my thought process has changed.
But I am no longer content to chase an image I want substance I want something that can go beyond simplistic pick up lines that are used a thousand times over. Yes I know I should smile no I am not going to and yes I know I have pretty eyes. Now that that is out of the way let's move on to something a bit deeper shall we?
Yes I have high standards but it seems as though my current standards used to be the norm. We have a dumbing down of real relationship ship goals can we get those back please?
Wednesday, August 5, 2015
Healthy Eating and Shopping
Today I tried to continue my healthy trend for eating. Not so much at home....I slept the day away; but with my shopping for food for my overnight shifts. Let me tell you a regular grocery store leaves things very lacking. Now i see why Americans are the fattest country in the world. Our serving sizes are ridiculous and our food choices are so lacking in nutrition it defies logic.
Now I am not the healthiest person in this country, but when looking for real food choices I am beyond floored. Not at the variety of options, at the pure lack of nutrional value our food contains. How do I know this to be true you may ask. Well i will tell you. This past week i pulled some extra hours at work; doing this always limits my time to eat, so of course i defaulted to fast food to fuill in the gap. Now all total i ate 5 meals that were fast food based. They tore up my stomach and i felt tired and sluggish in the time periods where i was awake and fighting for lucidity. 5 meals shpuold not make your poo go atomic and have you praying to the toilet gods for an end to the pain and misery. I know TMI, but we have to face facts; we are ingesting very empty calories and chemicals that are destroying our bodies.
The dinner i cooked Monday night was simple fare yet by the time i was half way done i was feeling satisfied. Didn't happen with the fast food. i look forward to the days i can cook and find better healthier food. Back to my shopping trip....one thing i do my best to do is have a fruit with my lunch. Normally not in any kind of juice or liquid a) cuts down on sugars and b) it just better for you. At the grocery store could i find fruit like this? Hardly. oh the had cut cantaloupe but I could tell i was chock full of preservatives. No fruit sits that long in a refrigeration unit and still looks that fresh. Again not the healthiest but honestly if i make it to 90 i really don't want to look like i am 30.
Yes the fat guy is making a case for real healthy food. Chock full of vitamins minerals...flavor and oh my gosh real taste. Seriously soon we are going to have chicken flavored chicken because what will be given to us wont even be a true piece of meat. Ladies and gentlemen it is time we take a stand and demand that our food be food. Not a list of chemicals made to taste like food. 15 years from now we are going to have raspberries with real raspberry flavoring. Seriously think about it just for a second...laugh now but know the day is coming where food is not food. It is a gray paste made to taste like....insert your flavor. We need to get back to the basics. Refuse to buy prepackaged crap. Cook, i mean real food with real flavor and real texture.
Now I am not the healthiest person in this country, but when looking for real food choices I am beyond floored. Not at the variety of options, at the pure lack of nutrional value our food contains. How do I know this to be true you may ask. Well i will tell you. This past week i pulled some extra hours at work; doing this always limits my time to eat, so of course i defaulted to fast food to fuill in the gap. Now all total i ate 5 meals that were fast food based. They tore up my stomach and i felt tired and sluggish in the time periods where i was awake and fighting for lucidity. 5 meals shpuold not make your poo go atomic and have you praying to the toilet gods for an end to the pain and misery. I know TMI, but we have to face facts; we are ingesting very empty calories and chemicals that are destroying our bodies.
The dinner i cooked Monday night was simple fare yet by the time i was half way done i was feeling satisfied. Didn't happen with the fast food. i look forward to the days i can cook and find better healthier food. Back to my shopping trip....one thing i do my best to do is have a fruit with my lunch. Normally not in any kind of juice or liquid a) cuts down on sugars and b) it just better for you. At the grocery store could i find fruit like this? Hardly. oh the had cut cantaloupe but I could tell i was chock full of preservatives. No fruit sits that long in a refrigeration unit and still looks that fresh. Again not the healthiest but honestly if i make it to 90 i really don't want to look like i am 30.
Yes the fat guy is making a case for real healthy food. Chock full of vitamins minerals...flavor and oh my gosh real taste. Seriously soon we are going to have chicken flavored chicken because what will be given to us wont even be a true piece of meat. Ladies and gentlemen it is time we take a stand and demand that our food be food. Not a list of chemicals made to taste like food. 15 years from now we are going to have raspberries with real raspberry flavoring. Seriously think about it just for a second...laugh now but know the day is coming where food is not food. It is a gray paste made to taste like....insert your flavor. We need to get back to the basics. Refuse to buy prepackaged crap. Cook, i mean real food with real flavor and real texture.
Thursday, July 23, 2015
My thoughts on my dad
Today i write a blog about my dad. yes I am still in the healing process and yes it is hard. Earlier this yeah i spent time in an area that i was not really aware he went to. But after going and seeing the simple beauty and the majesty of being out in nature surrounded by trees....it brought back some memories of stuff we did as kids. It brought back seeing my dad more relaxed...I think he liked the outdoors more than he wanted to admit. I got to see the world through mydads eys for just a moment.
For the many who knew my dad i am begining to see there are a very select few that actually knew my dad. Now i know some people can say I grew up with him but i spent so much time trying not to be like him i missed a ton. Hindsight is definately 20/20 and what it is showing me is enlightening. I know my dad is not a saint. He always said we are very alike....if thats the case then i guess it is a good thing he knew some Godly people. Some of the same people i know and tell me the same thing they told him. We are preaying for you. Now in his case it may have been because he had 3 willfull, hardheaded, very intelliegent children.....me cause I am still that way. My dad was a great man not because he did great things, or left us a legacy that will span generations but he taught me something more. How to be a particular kind of man, not the kind of man who sits back and says life is doing me wrong so i better do nothing at all. He taught me that choosing to love someone is going to be one of the toughest decisions i can make and when i do stick to it. One of the best things he taught me, something i didnt appricate until he was gone, is Trust in God and love God and every thing will work out how it should. I had survivors guilt. I had guillt because i was in washington instead of Vegas. I had tons of guilt and didnt know how to deal with it.
Now I have hope for a btter tomorrow because i started paying attention to what nmy dad worked hard to teach me. He always said "son I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did". Well some I have and some i have made my own, but through it all I always remeber my dad making a concious choice to accept some of my choices that i thought were at the time right for me. Cause we both remebered the lessons we were teaching and learning. I miss my dad...I don't have him to turn to anymore when i am troubled or lost....but i have what he was teaching me
For the many who knew my dad i am begining to see there are a very select few that actually knew my dad. Now i know some people can say I grew up with him but i spent so much time trying not to be like him i missed a ton. Hindsight is definately 20/20 and what it is showing me is enlightening. I know my dad is not a saint. He always said we are very alike....if thats the case then i guess it is a good thing he knew some Godly people. Some of the same people i know and tell me the same thing they told him. We are preaying for you. Now in his case it may have been because he had 3 willfull, hardheaded, very intelliegent children.....me cause I am still that way. My dad was a great man not because he did great things, or left us a legacy that will span generations but he taught me something more. How to be a particular kind of man, not the kind of man who sits back and says life is doing me wrong so i better do nothing at all. He taught me that choosing to love someone is going to be one of the toughest decisions i can make and when i do stick to it. One of the best things he taught me, something i didnt appricate until he was gone, is Trust in God and love God and every thing will work out how it should. I had survivors guilt. I had guillt because i was in washington instead of Vegas. I had tons of guilt and didnt know how to deal with it.
Now I have hope for a btter tomorrow because i started paying attention to what nmy dad worked hard to teach me. He always said "son I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did". Well some I have and some i have made my own, but through it all I always remeber my dad making a concious choice to accept some of my choices that i thought were at the time right for me. Cause we both remebered the lessons we were teaching and learning. I miss my dad...I don't have him to turn to anymore when i am troubled or lost....but i have what he was teaching me
Thursday, May 21, 2015
The difference
Disclaimer: this is my perspective the way I see it. If you don't like it stop reading and move on.
I have noticed a disturbing trend in relationships I am forming. I do sent mean it is wrong it is just wrong for me. That trend I am seeing....involves fantasy vs. reality. Now there is nothing wrong with a little fantasy and fun in any relationship. However the trend that I am seeing is that the expectation of the fantasy be the reality.
For anyone that actually knows me I deal with the real. Not saying that I can't have fun or enjoy a date night that seems drawn form a fantasy but in all things real life I like to deal in facts. I don't believe in playing games when I make a statement about how I feel or what I see.
Whats funny about this is no matter what I state I am told my perspective is wrong. Well news flash, it's my perspective so not only it is right but for it to change I have to do that and for me to do that you have to do something world changing. Why you might ask, and I can say 1.it's my perspective or 2.I can be brutally honest and let you know your behavior, your actions, and your words dont match. Yes you can object to everything I can say here and I will direct you to the disclaimer. Yes you can say I am an asshole and I will tell you 2 things. Yes I am. And I have never hidden that.
Wednesday, May 20, 2015
The Sentinel
This is my last attempt at poetry so if my words don't flow don't have a go at me. Please understand I am speaking from my heart lettering that last wall fall in hoppers I can gain back some of my humanity.
See you inspired me to go to the written word when I had given up hope of of speaking again. You encouraged me t ok seek the voice that I have been missing, to busy pudding away the gift that I have been graced with. Facing once again losing a gift I had been graced with I turn to the written word to convey the psalm that is on my heart.
Even though it started when I was young and graced with that golden tongue that turned you to look at me. I started to see a bigger picture when I leet you in so that I could knowingly sin. In your arms I felt happy for a time, but then things began to unwind. Since I was grown but not, I should have had the sense to stop before I damaged you, but like a selfish child I wanted more.
That left the door open for years and to many tears most of which I never cried as I tired to impart how you had my heart. See hindsight is 20/20 and though I see clearly now I was blinded then. I was blinded by my misery and shame could see that the whole time you were willing to stand beside me and lead me to the light. I was t ok busy trying to fight a battle that was mine. If I had a dime for every time I have you an excuse I would be well off. Pardon me as I cough from the dust that is rising from my index emotions, tightly locked away from coming out to play since I had been hurt before.
I know you are not her or them but in your own way while tending my garden you were slowly destroying me, but that is because I would not let you see through the fog of my wounds as they poured out more smoke. Yes those screens we used to choke and kill the romance we had and now using that hindsight 20/20 ok wish I could take it back.
Nothing to do be be a man accept my mistakes say a heartfelt I am sorry to the one woman who stood in my corner against all odds and fought for me. My sentinel, my guardian even when the job is no longer yours you stand a post better than most and longer than all. I don't know if this is your call given to you by the divine Master but I say thank you a and I am sorry for all the hurt I caused. I am flawed and broken though with you standing guard I get to play the card one more time.
See you inspired me to go to the written word when I had given up hope of of speaking again. You encouraged me t ok seek the voice that I have been missing, to busy pudding away the gift that I have been graced with. Facing once again losing a gift I had been graced with I turn to the written word to convey the psalm that is on my heart.
Even though it started when I was young and graced with that golden tongue that turned you to look at me. I started to see a bigger picture when I leet you in so that I could knowingly sin. In your arms I felt happy for a time, but then things began to unwind. Since I was grown but not, I should have had the sense to stop before I damaged you, but like a selfish child I wanted more.
That left the door open for years and to many tears most of which I never cried as I tired to impart how you had my heart. See hindsight is 20/20 and though I see clearly now I was blinded then. I was blinded by my misery and shame could see that the whole time you were willing to stand beside me and lead me to the light. I was t ok busy trying to fight a battle that was mine. If I had a dime for every time I have you an excuse I would be well off. Pardon me as I cough from the dust that is rising from my index emotions, tightly locked away from coming out to play since I had been hurt before.
I know you are not her or them but in your own way while tending my garden you were slowly destroying me, but that is because I would not let you see through the fog of my wounds as they poured out more smoke. Yes those screens we used to choke and kill the romance we had and now using that hindsight 20/20 ok wish I could take it back.
Nothing to do be be a man accept my mistakes say a heartfelt I am sorry to the one woman who stood in my corner against all odds and fought for me. My sentinel, my guardian even when the job is no longer yours you stand a post better than most and longer than all. I don't know if this is your call given to you by the divine Master but I say thank you a and I am sorry for all the hurt I caused. I am flawed and broken though with you standing guard I get to play the card one more time.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Dante's Inferno Goes Gamer
So I finally picked up a game that challenges some very set conventions around video games. Dante's
Inferno was uber-disturbing. Lets start with the imagery that was taken straight from the poem. If you have not read it well you are missing a lot. The minor demons are standard fare for video games; slightly uninspired for this game yet what makes them stand out would be the damned souls that they are torturing. The ambient noise and music also lends to the feeling of surreal and slight freakiness. This game goes into some great visuals on everything in the foreground but everything in the background is very generic. This is one of the game's small failings but by and large this game deserves at leat a 4 star rating. Music and ambient noise lend to the overall sense of impending doom up until the last level. Then the game takes a turn for the cheeseball. The inclusion of the orignal poem does lend the game some credence epecially if you read as you progress through the levels of hell. For those unfamilar with the actual poem here is a chance to see a chilling but possibly drug induced dream of a mans look at Hel. Now back to the game, it was good but the gaame on the last few levels seems to run out of stema and resort to cheap over played video game sentimentality. This would be the game's major failing but over all the game holds togther with out any major glithces. So gamers go check out this game and see a dream a vision come to life on a gaming system in a very good mix of action platforming and level progression.
Inferno was uber-disturbing. Lets start with the imagery that was taken straight from the poem. If you have not read it well you are missing a lot. The minor demons are standard fare for video games; slightly uninspired for this game yet what makes them stand out would be the damned souls that they are torturing. The ambient noise and music also lends to the feeling of surreal and slight freakiness. This game goes into some great visuals on everything in the foreground but everything in the background is very generic. This is one of the game's small failings but by and large this game deserves at leat a 4 star rating. Music and ambient noise lend to the overall sense of impending doom up until the last level. Then the game takes a turn for the cheeseball. The inclusion of the orignal poem does lend the game some credence epecially if you read as you progress through the levels of hell. For those unfamilar with the actual poem here is a chance to see a chilling but possibly drug induced dream of a mans look at Hel. Now back to the game, it was good but the gaame on the last few levels seems to run out of stema and resort to cheap over played video game sentimentality. This would be the game's major failing but over all the game holds togther with out any major glithces. So gamers go check out this game and see a dream a vision come to life on a gaming system in a very good mix of action platforming and level progression.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Why do we hate truth
Why do we hate the truth? I mean we are taught to tell the truth. In fact more often than not we learn from the examples our parents set for us. So it becomes easy to tell white lies and we go to church and they do it there and we learn to slowly hate the truth. I recently was introduced to 2 videos that state the Truth is small simple words that everyone can understand. And the response to these videos was universally the same. People posted as to why this man was so wrong in telling the Truth. Listening to a young man describe the difference Jesus and religion and state Truth. Because
See God speaks to us in so many ways and we are so busy with our lives and our worries that we forget to be still and listen to simple truth. And being still is what it is all about, just so we can hear that small still voice tell us the Truth. Funny thing is we don't want to hear it because that would mean we would have to stop lying to ourselves about ourselves. Or that we would have to challenge tightly held beliefs because it doesn't really jive with real Truth.
Think about it like this.....real truth is ugly at first, because it makes us see the ugliness in us. But then it can transform us into something beautiful, majestic, inspiring if we just let it and we stop and listen.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Your Choice
What makes a bad parent? Let's not go with the obvious choices let's go deeper and think harder for just a few seconds and see what we come up with. I have not seen my daughter in about 8 years and at first glance everyone would say I am a bad parent. A statistic a number that can be tracked and collated and distilled to banality. Yet that is not the whole story of the situation. Many people can say oh well do something about it but because I can't does that make me a bad parent?
Lets look at the other side of the story; her mother. The "good" parent, maybe. The parent that cares for her in person has full custody and yet hides from me and my family. This is the parent that demanded she have our child the majority of the week. Fought to keep me a "weekend" parent even though I arranged my schedule with my job at the time so that I could have more time with my daughter. The "good" parent conspired with her family to essentially kidnap our child. And yet her mom is still the "best" parent.
I am under the impression that for any one to be considered a good parent the guy has to pay out of the nose and the woman has very little accountability. I am automatically the bad parent even though my home had everything my daughter could want or need. I spent time with her and taught her what she needed for the time. She had manners and knew how to wash her hands before eating and how to wipe them when she got messy. Yep being a bad parent was such a tiresome thing. I don't know about anyone else but I think that from my point of view being the bad parent may not have been so bad at all. The next time you run into the "bad" parent look beneath the surface and see if there something deeper.
Lets look at the other side of the story; her mother. The "good" parent, maybe. The parent that cares for her in person has full custody and yet hides from me and my family. This is the parent that demanded she have our child the majority of the week. Fought to keep me a "weekend" parent even though I arranged my schedule with my job at the time so that I could have more time with my daughter. The "good" parent conspired with her family to essentially kidnap our child. And yet her mom is still the "best" parent.
I am under the impression that for any one to be considered a good parent the guy has to pay out of the nose and the woman has very little accountability. I am automatically the bad parent even though my home had everything my daughter could want or need. I spent time with her and taught her what she needed for the time. She had manners and knew how to wash her hands before eating and how to wipe them when she got messy. Yep being a bad parent was such a tiresome thing. I don't know about anyone else but I think that from my point of view being the bad parent may not have been so bad at all. The next time you run into the "bad" parent look beneath the surface and see if there something deeper.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Being A Foodie
So this is going to be my first food blog but not my last. There will even be video coming as soon as I can find the stuff I want to show. For anyone who knows me I am a very picky eater and seriously more of a carnivore than an omnivore. My journey started in OR about hmmmmmm 10 years ago when I seriously started experimenting with my grill and stove. I found a great recipe for an awesome BBQ sauce and my mole (pronounced mo lea) with a little help from a friend's secret sauce, exploded. I started experimenting with my flavors and seasoning and grew exponentially.
So that brings us to the here and now. I go to sushi; and trust me that is a leap for me; and I do other foods while still being picky. Yeah I am picky I don't like onion, can't eat bell peppers and most fish i still wont eat. Can't stand the smell and I will not absolutely will not eat shell fish. So yes as a foodie I fail some what, but I still like tons of other stuff.
As I write this I am thinking that BBQ season is coming upon us. Time to take out the sugar (brown) and spice and everything nice. I think this year I will try my hand at 2 home made BBQ sauces and maybe a few dry rubs. Now all I need is a smoker and I will be ready and set to do my thing.
So that brings us to the here and now. I go to sushi; and trust me that is a leap for me; and I do other foods while still being picky. Yeah I am picky I don't like onion, can't eat bell peppers and most fish i still wont eat. Can't stand the smell and I will not absolutely will not eat shell fish. So yes as a foodie I fail some what, but I still like tons of other stuff.
As I write this I am thinking that BBQ season is coming upon us. Time to take out the sugar (brown) and spice and everything nice. I think this year I will try my hand at 2 home made BBQ sauces and maybe a few dry rubs. Now all I need is a smoker and I will be ready and set to do my thing.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Cartoons, Cartoons
Do you remember when Bugs Bunny, Elmer Fudd, Daffy Duck, The Hairy Monster were all funny cartoons that we could watch and enjoy. Simple comedy from a cross dressing rabbit, a loud mouthed duck, and a bald man with a speech impediment. These were cartoons that defined several generations inculding mine. Lets go further and look at the cartoons we watched on Saturday mornings. Go Bots and Transformers, Smurfs, Snorks, The Amazing Spider man and his Super Friends. There was the X-Men and Richie Rich. Then the cartoons we rushed home to watch....one of my faves Robotech and G.I. Joe, there was Darkwing Duck, Tailspin, Duck Tails, Gargoyles, M.A.S.K, Silverhawks, S.W.A.T Kats, and so many others. the common thread between all of these cartoons was simple and direct. There was a bad guys and there was a good guy(or girl). The good guys normally came out on top in the end but sometimes....not so much.
Today's cartoons seem to be about making kids not see that there is good and bad in the world but that there is just plain old stupidity and it is ok to be that way. even some of the better ones like Phineas and Ferb and Johnny Test seem to include overly simple and overly moronic bad guys good guys or just all around guys. What has happened to cartoons teaching values and being truly funny. Not funny in a Jackass kind of way but using true humor to get a laugh?
How many 20 and 30 somethings remember when a cartoon was good because it was not overly simple but not overly complicated either? Last truly good cartoon i can think of came from Nickelodeon and then it seemed to be geared to older kids and not the younger ones. You may ask what this cartoon is and I will tell you the answer in the next sentence. Hahahaha ok enough joking around Avatar: The Last Airbender was great since it came out in a time when good cartoons were falling off TV like flies in a cold snap.
You may wonder why I am writing about cartoons and why i would make mention of so many that seem so corny now that we have reached adulthood. Well I will tell you why; I am writing because i have discovered the joy of sharing some of my old cartoons with kids. We may think they are corny and really really old fashioned but I am finding a new generation is enthralled with things that came out of the 60's, 70's, 80's, and 90's. Somewhere along the way we forgot to just K.I.S.S. (keep it simple stupid) and let kids enjoy being kids. I love the fact that i have a 9 year old asking me to watch Voltron with him and seeing him on Netflix go for the Pink Panther cartoons instead of something mindless and designed for today's kids. Imitation is the best form of flattery but imagination sets you free.
Today's cartoons seem to be about making kids not see that there is good and bad in the world but that there is just plain old stupidity and it is ok to be that way. even some of the better ones like Phineas and Ferb and Johnny Test seem to include overly simple and overly moronic bad guys good guys or just all around guys. What has happened to cartoons teaching values and being truly funny. Not funny in a Jackass kind of way but using true humor to get a laugh?
How many 20 and 30 somethings remember when a cartoon was good because it was not overly simple but not overly complicated either? Last truly good cartoon i can think of came from Nickelodeon and then it seemed to be geared to older kids and not the younger ones. You may ask what this cartoon is and I will tell you the answer in the next sentence. Hahahaha ok enough joking around Avatar: The Last Airbender was great since it came out in a time when good cartoons were falling off TV like flies in a cold snap.
You may wonder why I am writing about cartoons and why i would make mention of so many that seem so corny now that we have reached adulthood. Well I will tell you why; I am writing because i have discovered the joy of sharing some of my old cartoons with kids. We may think they are corny and really really old fashioned but I am finding a new generation is enthralled with things that came out of the 60's, 70's, 80's, and 90's. Somewhere along the way we forgot to just K.I.S.S. (keep it simple stupid) and let kids enjoy being kids. I love the fact that i have a 9 year old asking me to watch Voltron with him and seeing him on Netflix go for the Pink Panther cartoons instead of something mindless and designed for today's kids. Imitation is the best form of flattery but imagination sets you free.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
The World from My Eyes
How do you see the world? What colors your views and how do use your experiences to interact with the world at large? I see the world as largely black and white with some some small gray areas stuck in there just for fun. I know why I see the world in this manner and it all breaks down to it makes the world safe for me.
How could Icome to the conclusion that the world is mostly black and white? Lets take a fantastic voyage into the nether realms of my mind to find the answer. First I grew up in the 'hood, Los Angeles, home of the Lakers, the Clippers, the Dodgers, and well most the good memories in my life. However there are some things I would love to forget; some things that we will allude to but not actually say.
OK so here we go...I moved to L.A.when i was 6 from a small town called Mojave. Now it was all exciting and new until i found out that boys of my coloring were not liked by all. Instance number 1...elementary school was not fun. Then having a sister who is smart and having every one comparing you to her...well instance number 2, Then there was a divorce and more school and then a group of "friends" who took me to a new understanding of how we fall prey to our own insecurities. Instance number 3 in this wonderful little drama called my life. I made some changes in high school got a mentor and changed my latitude in life but what made me, me has always been the same.
Each instance has shaped me in a way that can not be quantified by just words. Every experience, every moment, when viewed in hindsight has brought deeper understand of why things are for me. Why life appears so black and white sprinkled with gray. Church had some thing to do with it and interactions with my parents and friends of differing faiths and religions but the overriding theme is people. People help us see or not see the world for all of its varying colors; people make up the palette and the canvas that we use to paint our lives.
So why do you see the world the way you do? Is it people, a person, a personal experience, what has defined you through out your life? When you look closely you will find your underlying reason for the coloration of your world view.
How could Icome to the conclusion that the world is mostly black and white? Lets take a fantastic voyage into the nether realms of my mind to find the answer. First I grew up in the 'hood, Los Angeles, home of the Lakers, the Clippers, the Dodgers, and well most the good memories in my life. However there are some things I would love to forget; some things that we will allude to but not actually say.
OK so here we go...I moved to L.A.when i was 6 from a small town called Mojave. Now it was all exciting and new until i found out that boys of my coloring were not liked by all. Instance number 1...elementary school was not fun. Then having a sister who is smart and having every one comparing you to her...well instance number 2, Then there was a divorce and more school and then a group of "friends" who took me to a new understanding of how we fall prey to our own insecurities. Instance number 3 in this wonderful little drama called my life. I made some changes in high school got a mentor and changed my latitude in life but what made me, me has always been the same.
Each instance has shaped me in a way that can not be quantified by just words. Every experience, every moment, when viewed in hindsight has brought deeper understand of why things are for me. Why life appears so black and white sprinkled with gray. Church had some thing to do with it and interactions with my parents and friends of differing faiths and religions but the overriding theme is people. People help us see or not see the world for all of its varying colors; people make up the palette and the canvas that we use to paint our lives.
So why do you see the world the way you do? Is it people, a person, a personal experience, what has defined you through out your life? When you look closely you will find your underlying reason for the coloration of your world view.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Working Today
OK so here I am at 33 still in the ranks of the unemployed. I am doing everything I can to make some thing happen. I have been not called, called back, told(through email of course) not the right fit, over qualified, under qualifiied, or a close match but not what the company is looking for at this time.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury I submit to you that companies are happy with the way things are. What I mean is this; our economic down turn is the perfect excuse to excuse corporate bad behaviour. No i don't think that every company should hire just any one if they apply but i think they do need to look past a piece of paper or an email and get to know the person applying. Keywords do not a person make. Just by looking at resume you can't tell how some one will be as an employee.
I wonder what would happen if the President really took an interest in the job market and made a law saying that every 10th interview had to be a hire...regardless of qualifications. Well I can speculate what that would do and any one with an imagination can too. My point here is this is how companies are treating the unemployed American public. There is a blanket assumption that unemployed means undesirable. Some people don't fit the jobs they choose to do. I have taken a few of those and I was not happy in them. I could do the work but the job didn't fit me. Just because we are unemployed does not mean we won't can't or should not work.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury I submit to you that companies are happy with the way things are. What I mean is this; our economic down turn is the perfect excuse to excuse corporate bad behaviour. No i don't think that every company should hire just any one if they apply but i think they do need to look past a piece of paper or an email and get to know the person applying. Keywords do not a person make. Just by looking at resume you can't tell how some one will be as an employee.
I wonder what would happen if the President really took an interest in the job market and made a law saying that every 10th interview had to be a hire...regardless of qualifications. Well I can speculate what that would do and any one with an imagination can too. My point here is this is how companies are treating the unemployed American public. There is a blanket assumption that unemployed means undesirable. Some people don't fit the jobs they choose to do. I have taken a few of those and I was not happy in them. I could do the work but the job didn't fit me. Just because we are unemployed does not mean we won't can't or should not work.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)